Muñeca te lo Ruego (Agitame la Boca)

 

It's not that Ekko hates Jinx, but she's definitely not someone he likes or wants to spend time with. Unfortunately, the universe hates Ekko, so obviously he runs into her in every corner and office of the faculty ever since his first year of college.

It doesn't help that both his career and the campus are incredibly small, causing everyone to know each other.

“I just don’t get it,” Zeri said once, while they were having lunch together between classes. “You've never even talked with that girl in your life, why do you dislike her?” His best friend looked at him curiously as she devoured her ground beef schnitzel sandwich. Ekko had to bite back a comment about the dubious origin of that sandwich.

Ekko snorted, reluctant to share his reasons, because, if he was honest... he didn't have many reasons to dislike Jinx. His displeasure with the girl began when they were freshmen and Ekko, who had been the valedictorian of his high school, found himself immersed in a silent competition against Jinx to get the best grades. Jinx, in his opinion, shouldn’t be a student with an average of ten; she was always late and barely took notes, while Ekko practically opened up the campus with how early he arrived in the mornings and cramped his hands taking notes in class.

And even then he always ended up below Jinx, even if it was by hundredths. If she got a 9.50, he got a 9, and if she got a 10, the teacher insulted him by giving him a 9.50. There was always something missing; the exams in which both of them got a ten were counted on the fingers.

“Since when do I have to have a reason to dislike someone? You are the vibes girl, you dislike half the faculty based only on ‘vibes,’” he argued, annoyed by Zeri’s insistence.

“I want some kind of explanation, because, look, I'm taking Russian Semiotics with her this year and I don't think she’s a bitch at all.”

Zeri proceeded to tell her that out of the five students who were taking the elective, Jinx was the first to approach Zeri, proposing her to summarize the units of the program together to lighten the load. They knew each other by sight, since they were freshmen on the same year, but they had never exchanged words until then. She concluded her story by saying that her sixth sense—the one that told her when a person was a bitch pretending to be a fairy of light—never activated when she was with her.

Was Jinx a little bit off? Yes, sure. No one reaches the third year of a humanities degree is completely well; sometimes she zoned off, lost in her own world, said her thoughts out loud and had very sudden changes of attitude, but she never disrespected her or anyone.

“I think what's really going on with you.” She paused to take a sip of that horrible soda that only she liked, “Is that you like her but you’re deep in denial about it.”

“Of course not!” He exclaimed, drawing the attention of the rest of the people in the cafeteria. Zeri gave her that cat-like smile that only appeared when she knew she was right, but she didn't insist any further.

That, of course, wasn't the end of the matter, because the further he progressed in his degree, the smaller the number of students became. And to his bad, horrible, terrible luck, Jinx was also doing both an academic and a teaching degree. His only consolation was that she decided to specialize in classical studies while he specialized in linguistics, so in his fourth year he only saw her pass by the halls sporadically.

His fourth year was going very peacefully, too peacefully he would say, when one afternoon, waiting for the last class of the day to begin, he saw an announcement on the faculty’s website that almost made him drop his thermos of coffee.

Call for applications, STUDENT ASSISTANTSHIPS

May 2023

POSITIONS THAT ARE OPENING UP

DEPARTMENT OF HUMANITIES:

General Linguistics I

Introduction to the Spanish Language

Introduction to Literature

Language and Communication

The list of positions continued, but his gaze remained fixed on the first subject on the list: general linguistics I, his favorite class in his entire career trajectory.

Everyone told him that he was crazy, that there was no way he liked suffering so much that, of all the classes in the curriculum, he liked the karma class of almost all the students. Ekko never paid any attention to the hateful words towards General Linguistics, saying that it the rest of the world’s problem if they didn’t do the assigned readings or didn’t have a passion for linguistics like him.

That position had to be his.

With his heart beating wildly, he packed his things as quickly as he could and went to the competitions office to ask for an application. He filled it out as quickly as he could on the stairs and hastily walked to the student affairs office before the unfriendly secretary closed the window two hours earlier than she should, as per usual.

The excitement faded when he saw Jinx leaning against the wall near the window, checking her phone. With hesitant steps he approached the office, impatiently greeting the secretary.

“I came to drop off the student assistantship application, I need it to be revised,” he said impatiently, passing the paper under the glass.

The secretary took the application with disinterest and informed him that the revision would take about ten minutes, and that he was more than welcome to wait, with a tone that indicated otherwise. Ekko looked at his watch; there were still forty minutes until the Discourse Analysis lecture began.

He positioned himself on the other side of the window—away from Jinx—and he more than ever wished he had some way to speed up time; the seconds were passing too slowly, and the caffeine in his system did nothing to calm him down.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Jinx turn to look at him, leaning on her side against the wall. Please, god, not now.

“Hey, you’re Ekko, right?” she asked, squinting her eyes.

He flinched quietly as he turned to meet her gaze. He was a polite person above all, and he couldn’t go around glaring at someone who had just greeted him, especially if that person was going to be his colleague in a very near future.

“Yeah, it’s me. You’re Jinx, right?”

“Yep. That’s what they call me,” she said, giving him a relaxed smile. Why did he have to have a nice smile? Ekko stood, without saying a thing. “Are you here to apply for an assistantship as well?”

He frowned when he heard her say “as well.” His heart began to beat like a drum, but he tried to remain calm.

“Yeah, I’m applying for the linguistics assistantship,” he informed her, trying not to sound as anxious as he felt. Jinx’s smile grew, and he could see the crinkle around her eyes.

“Hey! I’m applying for that assistantship too. Professor Heimerdinger invited me to apply.”

The smile froze on Ekko’s face, as he felt an irrational anger spread through his veins. His right eye twitched, and he had to take a deep breath to keep from telling Jinx that he’d rather die than run for a position against her.

All of this thought process happened in the longest, most torturous second Ekko ever lived.

“Oh, really? Look at that, that's great. I thought I was going to be the only one to apply, almost no one likes that class.”

“I'm not saying I was fascinated by it, but I liked it quite a bit.” Jinx approached him with firm steps, still with a smile on her face. Ekko inhaled deeply to refrain from making hurtful comments, and with each step Jinx took, he moved a little further away. “I wanted to apply for the Phonetics I assistantship, but the head teacher retired and the one left in charge is an idiot.”

Ekko opened his mouth to question what she was doing taking classes and applying for assistantships in the linguistics area if she was specializing in classical studies, but the words died on the tip of his tongue as he remembered that, technically, he shouldn't know that, since this was the first time they had a formal conversation in four years of studying together. Jinx didn't need to know that he had found her Twitter account years ago, and that Ekko religiously logged in to read his posts once a week.

(In the back of his head, he hears Zeri's voice mocking him.)

“Salo’s the worst, the faculty should force him to retire early. He's going to make the students suffer,” he said, making Jinx giggle.

He didn't have time to think much about the pride he felt at being able to make her laugh when the secretary appeared with Jinx's application. She thanked her and put the papers in her backpack.

“I'm going home now, guess I’ll see you around,” she said, waving as she left. Ekko said goodbye in the same way and watched her leave, turning around and disappearing down the hall.

As soon as she left, he remembered that he didn't like her and competing for the assistantship against her was the worst thing that could have happened to him in all of the years he had been alive, so he did the most logical thing he could do at that moment and sent a message to Zeri.

[Ekko, 5/15/2023 4:02 PM] I'M GOING TO KILL MYSELF

[Zeri, 5/15/2023 4:02 PM] motherfucker i left 15 minutes ago

[Zeri, 5/15/2023 4:02 PM] what happened to you now??

[Ekko, 5/15/2023 4:03 PM] that bitch jinx is going to apply for the linguistics assistantship too

[Ekko, 5/15/2023 4:03 PM] i ran into her in the office when i came to drop off the application

Zeri proceeded to send him a one-minute voice message of her laughing and making fun of his misfortune.

Dude, you have to admit that your life is very funny, the audio said, literally, what were the chances? The universe wants to tell you something, I think. Maybe you should make out sloppy style and get it over with.

He didn’t dignify Zeri with an answer.

Just then the secretary appeared with his application and he ran off to the amphitheater, trying to ignore the words of his supposed best friend.

*

When the day of the contest arrived, Ekko felt more than ready to win the job.

They held a draw for the topic two days before; the topic proposed by Professor Heimerdinger, Voloshinov and the ideological sign, had won. Although Ekko had passed the three exams of the class without any major conflict, he still remembers the headache understanding and explaining Voloshinov's theory had inflicted on him.

But if he wanted this position, he had to be able to explain every point of the program as if he had written the damn theory. So he armed himself with coffee and Zeri's patience to prepare a forty-minute lecture on Voloshinov and his linguistic theory.

By the time the moment of the competition came, Zeri probably knew the lecture as well as Ekko, who had used her as a guinea pig to improve his script.

When he stood in front of the examining board, which consisted of Professor Heimerdinger, Viktor, the head of practical work, and Mel Medarda, the head of the department, he did not let Mel's inquisitive look intimidate him; he went ahead with his lecture, without hesitation or doubting his knowledge.

The cherry on the cake was when he said his conclusions and seconds later the alarm sounded, indicating the culmination of the forty minutes. He smiled, proud of himself, thanked the professors for their time and left the classroom. Outside he found Zeri standing next to Jinx, chatting amicably. He was about to say something, until he noticed Jinx's outfit and closed his mouth, blinking several times.

She was wearing a long, tight grey skirt that ended above the knee, which showed off every curve of her body perfectly, along with a white long-sleeved shirt that definitely had to be a size smaller, since it was so tight on her the first two buttons were loose, exposing her neck and the beginning of her breasts. Her hair, which she normally wore in two long braids, was tied back in a high ponytail, with a braid so intricate that it gave Ekko a headache trying to figure out how she had done it.

Zeri and Jinx turned to look at him after a few seconds, when they noticed his presence.

“Ekko! How did it go?” Zeri asked, smiling. Ekko's gaze didn't leave Jinx, who looked at him with a curious smile.

“Um... Good. Yes, good. I did my best,” he said, forcing his brain to respond.

“I hope your best attempt is half as good as mine,” Jinx joked, straightening her clothes. Suddenly, the classroom door opened and Professor Medarda beckoned Jinx to come in to begin her lecture. “Well! Here I go, see you later.”

She offered the pair of them a friendly smile. Ekko thought she purposely stared directly at him as she buttoned up her buttons. As she passed, the scent of Jinx’s perfume filled his nose; it was floral, with hints of vanilla.

As the door closed behind them, Zeri smacked him back to his senses.

“Could you be any more obvious? I even feel sorry for you now.”

“Obvious with what?”

Zeri looked at him incredulously.

“At this point, I’m not sure if you're fucking with me or if you're just that dense,” she complained, starting to walk towards the cafeteria. “Obviously your crush on Jinx. No one believes you anymore when you say you don't like her, your eyes almost popped out of their sockets when you saw her.”

Ekko pushed Zeri, but he lacked the dignity to respond to her accusation.

*

When the court announced Jinx as the winner of the contest, Ekko's hatred for her solidified in his veins.

Jinx's triumphant smile was etched in his mind; he wanted to shake her by the braids, tell her everything he had been holding in his throat since first year, tell her that he deserved that position and not her.

Instead, he shook her hand and congratulated her on her victory. Jinx smiled at him in such a genuine way that his cheeks reddened with embarrassment at not being able to reciprocate the enthusiasm. Life went on, until September came and brought with it spring. Ekko never ran into Jinx directly again, only seeing her in passing here and there in the hallways, going from office to office with folders under her arm, following Professor Heimerdinger like a shadow; in short, too busy to notice Ekko's presence.

Jinx's absence, however, did not mean that Zeri had stopped bothering him. He didn't care; it was completely harmless anyway. As long as Jinx wasn't around, he had nothing to worry about.

Or so he thought.

“Hey, Ekko, where’s Zeri?” Seraphine asks, and Ekko has to look down to find her gaze. She's crouched down, adding ice to the hellish stuff she mixed in the jar.

It takes him a few seconds to speak without stumbling. “She went to the bathroom with Akali.”

“Ugh, again? She's here for two seconds and then she goes back to the bathroom for an hour.”

Ekko shrugs, taking a sip from the glass of vodka with… well, he has no idea what Zeri used to mix the vodka, but it’s vodka with something in it.

The student day party is one of the most anticipated events of each year; Ekko has never missed one since he started college. His blood alcohol level is already high enough to make talking without slurring a challenge, so he contemplates stopping drinking before the bus driver of the 213 refuses to let him on. It happened to him in previous years, he doesn’t plan on risking it this time. He’s used up all his money on drinks, he has nothing left for Uber.

“Hey guys, what did I miss?” Zeri’s voice rises over the volume of the speakers. Ekko turns to look at her, and nearly vomits the contents of his stomach when he sees the woman from his nightmares clinging to the arm of his now ex-best friend.

Jinx is clinging to Zeri's arm like a lifeline, clutching a bottle of lemon-flavored Sky, wearing dangerously short jean shorts, a white crochet top, and worn-out black sneakers. Her mouth is painted in a deep red that matches the lip stains that adorns the mouth of the bottle, with an eyeliner that disappears with every drop of sweat that falls down her face.

In his head, Zeri's voice rings out. Maybe you should make out sloppy style and get it over with.

Ekko's gaze meets Zeri's, a silent threat that the green-haired girl doesn't take seriously.

“You don't care if Jinx stays with us, do you?” She asks innocently, to which obviously no one objects. Ekko swallows his complaints and then the infernal drink that Seraphine hands him to try.

He does his best to ignore her, he swears on God, the Virgin Mary and all the angels he does try, but Jinx is so close to him that it's a Herculean task to keep his eyes from scanning the girl's body from top to bottom. The task reaches unheard of levels of difficulty when Akali and Zeri stick close to Jinx to dance together to the Chulo remix.

Speakers reverberate across his body, and Ekko gulps when his gaze meets Jinx's while she's still crouched. It's probably the alcohol making him hallucinate; there's no way Jinx could have winked at him, surely not.

He turns around to talk with Seraphine, though he still doesn't quite understand how she ended up on his group this year. Ekko figures you can get out of Zaun but Zaun will never get out of you.

Seraphine brings the mug to her lips and frowns when she notices the rest of them have finished the demonic drink she worked so hard to prepare while she was distracted.

“You want a shot of vodka?” Jinx says from behind her, holding the bottle out to Seraphine. Her eyes light up, taking the bottle until she realizes something.

“I’m not sober enough to put the shot in the cap,” she laments.

“What? It’s easier to take it straight from the bottle, that’s what I do,” she says. Ekko turns to look at her as if she’s crazy.

“You’ve been drinking straight vodka all afternoon? How are you still alive?” He asks, scandalized. Jinx laughs, moving closer to him.

“No, of course not. I was with my sister, her girlfriend, and her girlfriend’s friends, but the two bitches left and I ended up alone. I didn’t feel like staying with those stuck up pilties.” Jinx rolls her eyes. “Thank goodness I ran into Zeri in the bathroom, otherwise I would have left already.”

Not for the first time this afternoon, Ekko feels like strangling Zeri.

“Thank goodness then,” he says reluctantly.

Jinx smiles at him, saying something he can’t hear because his eyes betray him and come to rest, for a millisecond, on the neckline of her top.

Pervert, his mind tells him.

“Anybody want to go buy juice to cut the vodka?” Zeri says, snapping him out of his trance. She’s holding Jinx’s vodka in her hands. Without thinking twice, he offers himself to go buy it, thinking more so about escaping Jinx and her suffocating prescence.

To his bad luck, she goes with him.

It’s complete chaos—at this hour it’s impossible to buy alcohol at the tables of the faculty groups. The crowd of people in front of them looks more like a stampede of zombies than humans; Ekko supposes that between drunk and high university students and zombies there is not much difference.

Ekko ventures to try to get in the middle of the mass of bodies, and almost stumbles with his own feet when he feels Jinx's fingers grip his biceps.

“You sure you wanna get in there?” She asks, resting her cheek on his back, then pressing her chest against it. Ekko's heart beats so hard that he wonders for a second if what he's hearing is his own heartbeat or the base of the music playing on the speakers.

“What choice do I have?”

Part of him is afraid to turn around and meet the gaze of the woman that for years he's sworn torments him and realize that, unfortunately for him, maybe Zeri was right.

“Do you want me to show you?” Jinx says, pressing her fingers into the skin of his arms. Ekko feels all the alcohol he'd consumed evaporate from his body.

He breaks free from Jinx's grip, turning on his heels to look at her. Her face is the picture of mischief and Ekko feels his heart in his mouth.

Jinx pulls him closer by hooking her thumbs in the belt loops of his pants until their bodies are pressed together. She gives him a cat-like smile as she stands on her toes.

“This is the part where you grab my waist,” she says, and Ekko, with his brain on vacation, obeys her without being able to stop staring at her.

Before Jinx can do anything, Ekko decides to succumb to his desires and kisses her, without stopping to think about the consequences of kissing the chick he swore he didn’t like.

Maybe you should make out sloppy style and get it over with.

He tries not to think about Zeri as he lets his tongue explore Jinx’s molars, feeling her hands caress the skin on his neck. A shiver runs through him from head to toe, and before he knows it, Jinx bites his lower lip.

That's all it took to make him forget about the juice.

*

When Ekko sits next to Zeri in the cafeteria on Monday morning to drink coffee together before going to class, with the hickeys Jinx left him on Saturday still fresh and red, he doesn't have the dignity to get up and leave when Zeri’s loud mocking laugh echoes through all of the cafeteria.